ask gazeLLe – 5

    Gazelle is not an expert on anything. These answers are just opinions, some based on experiences, some just my own common sense. The questions have been edited to smaller sentences.

       Q: I am a pre-op transsexual living in Houston, and every time I go out I am always surrounded by beautiful men, and it is very difficult for me to let them know that I am not really a complete woman, and at the same time I love that they are so attracted to me. When do you think is the right time to drop the bomb?

(Nicole S. / TX)

       A: Well, I am sure you know the right time for it, I believe you’ve been in this situation many times, but I would say it right away, because this could be a dangerous game you could be playing, also it is important that they are really attracted to you, which they are already….but not to a fantasy of what you represent. Have you ever thought about what if you are attracted to this beautiful man you met, and after one month he tells you that he was really born a woman? How do you think you would feel?


       Q: I live in Texas but stay in Washington during the summer with family. And that’s when I go down to New York. My family is really conservative- can’t stress that enough. They are so conservative, I was a preacher’s kid and everything, and even the artwork I do bothers them. But I have lately found out that I want to transition from female to male. I have no clue how to break it to my family at all. Please help- what do I say to them and my friends?
( Z Z / Texas )

        A: Every situation is different, every family is different, what is the same is the desire to be truthful to who you are, and you might be able to hold it inside for a while, but at some point this can be unbearable, and your need to be yourself will be stronger than anything. If that was my case and I had to break it to my very conservative family, I would start with one person first, the one I would feel could understand that this is my decision to make, it is about your feelings and how you relate to the world, and then with the help of this person you could break the news for anybody else that you feel should know in this first phase of your decision. The toughest choice or perhaps the easiest is the one you made about transitioning, it is about the love you have for yourself, if those who surround you can not be open to the idea of accepting the new you, and their views are really important to you, then you will need to ask yourself if you would be willing to live unhappy for the rest of your life just because your family and friends could not agree about how you want to live your life.

Questions? Send it to

Freak Chic
by Gazelle Paulo

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